Have you ever noticed how, at most social functions, the food always takes center stage! Some people even judge the success of a function based on the food that was served! When asked, “Did you have fun at ______’s party?” you get an answer that gives you a description of the food that was offered.
Oh, I was such a socialite! I loved social functions because I could eat to my heart’s desire…and that desire was big! Personally speaking, I looked forward to every social function outlined on my calendar that I knew food would be present!
Have you ever planned an event like a birthday party, graduation party, christening party, etc. and 90% of your budget was for the food! Not only your budget, but your whole mindset about the party was based on the food you would serve. It would take longer to plan the food than it would the guest list. And let’s not forget the stress felt the few days before at the thought of not having enough food for everyone!
Does the food planning involve selections for your guests that are a good, well balanced meal with no artificial food enlisted? After all, the people you have selected to participate in the event are people you love and care about! No, instead my selections were the most taste satisfying…never about what was truly good for people!
Why do we do this? Why is the emphasis always on the food? What has become of us as people? And what about the people who really suffer with food related problems? We don’t shove alcoholic beverages to people we know have a drinking problem but when we are serving food, we expect everyone to partake in it. Not to mention, your guests expect it!
Have we become so bad at true socializing with people that we must have another god present so we can concentrate on that instead? The god of food has taken its place in our social functions!
When I first started my food addiction recovery program, the thought of going to a social function and not eating gave me the cold sweats! I couldn’t imagine that I would be able to have fun at all! And I certainly did not want to draw attention to myself that I wasn’t eating! But I knew that in order to recover, I had to get past this!
Guess what I found out? The first “party” I went to where there were tables of food set up everywhere, I didn’t eat. Even at the host’s insistence that I eat, to the point where she made a plate up for me and gave it to me, I did not eat! I enjoyed that party so much and remember every conversation that I was a part of. What I realizes was that I was socializing free of guilt and shame!
In the past, I would have piled my first, second and third plate. By that time, I would start to wander if anyone noticed how much I was eating. That made me feel self conscience and then I didn’t want to talk to anyone, Then I would feel shame about what I had just done and mentally beat myself up for, once again, my inability to control my food! And then I didn’t want to talk to anyone or if I did, it was to bitch about someone or something because I was feeling so bad inside myself!
I have successfully attended over 100 functions since beginning my recovery. I eat my meal before I go (so I know I won’t get hungry) and I haven’t had a bit to eat at any of these parties or functions! I love the feeling of the freedom of self confidence in these social situations! I am free to be the real me, not the one hiding behind guilt and shame, and I am loving it! I don’t even look at the food being offered…but if I do happen to see it, I feel nothing towards it!
I challenge you to give yourself 30 days and not pick up a morsel of food at any social function you attend! Please write to me ant tell me what happens (good or bad)! maureenc0908@gmail,com